Between Rejection and Resolve
Another rejection. Another closed door. But I know what I carry, and I refuse to let the world tell me otherwise.
Raw fucking emotion. I’ve been trying to find myself in a world that keeps pushing back. It’s discouraging. I’ve been growing tired. I put my best foot forward, but I’m caught between believing in myself and facing the weight of reality — my kids, my family, my bills. I can’t afford to do anything. All because I left one job to build something at another place that ended up screwing me over.
Another rejection
Last week, I had a job interview. I did wonderful. I walked out smiling, confident, like maybe things were about to shift. Then I got a text: due to restructuring, the budget wasn’t approved.
Another no. Another door slammed shut.
This is after countless rejection emails. Each one chips away at me. Each one tries to tell me I’m invisible. That I’m not what I know I am.
What I carry
I build systems. I design embedded software. I can outbuild entire development teams — in my sleep. And I’ll still build software that’s faster, cleaner, and more useful.
That’s not arrogance. That’s fact. I’ve done it alone. I’ve carried systems that whole departments couldn’t keep alive. I don’t just code — I architect, I design, I deliver. End to end. Solo.
So when the world tells me no, I don’t bow. I double down.
Between rejection and belief
I swear I’m not lying. Fuck these engineering teams.
I’ll outbuild you.
I’ll outbrain you.
At the same damn time.
Because I have to. Because my kids are watching. Because the only way forward is through.
Why I still build
I keep showing up. I keep writing. I keep building AOEngineering and Asset Pulse because that’s the only way I know to survive.
This is the space I’m living in — between rejection and belief. Between the no’s the world keeps handing me and the yes I keep trying to give myself.
One of them will win.
And I know which one I’m betting on.
founder@aoengineering.io